I’m fundraising for an outrageously chilly cause!
Welcome to The Cold Kahuna — a ride so cold it’ll make your kahunas retreat faster than your dignity on karaoke night. This testicle-tingling trek takes brave (read: slightly unhinged) souls on tiny, underpowered bikes — we’re talking 49cc to 125cc, lawnmower-level horsepower — straight into the frosty heart of Ohakune.
Why? Because we're #ridingforballs — literally. It’s all to raise cash and awareness for Testicular Cancer New Zealand and the Jolly Good Chaps Charitable Trust.
Yes, 100% of your donation goes straight to these good causes, not to thermal underwear or emergency shrinkage therapy.
Testicular cancer is one of the most beatable cancers — all it takes is a regular check of your crown jewels. So while we're freezing ours off, you can do your part by checking yours (or if you're feeling generous, offer a friendly reminder to someone you love. Consensually, of course.)
So please donate today! Every dollar helps. Every ball deserves a fighting chance.
My Updates
Postie Bike pickup - 12th July
Saturday 5th JulIt’s official — I’ve secured the steed for this frostbitten foolishness. Behold: the legendary 2015 Honda NBC110, also known as the Postie Bike… or New Zealand’s most reliable mail-delivery mule. With a mind-blowing 8 horsepower and a top speed of 88km/h — but only if dropped from a plane — this mechanical marvel will be my trusty companion on The Cold Kahuna.
Pickup is happening on July 12th, and yes, pics are coming soon. Expect glamour shots, awkward angles, and maybe one or two posed with the majestic beast like it’s a centerfold in Postie Weekly.
Stay tuned. It’s gonna be slow. And cold. And glorious.
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Donation from your wife with your money haha!